Friday, September 14, 2007

stay a while longer...

i went to the doctor yesterday. lately appointments have been pretty boring, but this one was the first time the doctor was going to check to see if i was dilated. i didn't think i would be disappointed when she said "you are not dilated at all" - but i totally was. up to this point i'd been totally ok with little owen waiting as long as possible to get here- not that i'm not anxious, i just was feeling overwhelmed with work and getting ready and everything. in my mind, it would be perfect to stop working, have 2 weeks to myself to relax and get last minute things done, and then he could come. right on his due date would be perfect in fact.
yet, sitting at home waiting for the inevitable has made me want him to be here now! i just want to hold him and see who he looks like and kiss those little fingers and toes!
of course i emailed clint right away at work when i got home from the doctor and told him how bummed i was that apparently owen was not in a very big hurry to get here. as he always does (that level headed hubby of mine) - he knew exactly the right thing to say. he reminded me that maybe owen wants a little more time to be extra close to his mom, and maybe Heavenly Father was having a hard time letting him go. of course, the tears started flowing and I started thinking.
wow. what a miracle. this little boy is coming straight from Heavenly Father's arms to ours.
i can't stop thinking about what he must be doing getting ready to come.
i imagine him spending as much time as possible with Heavenly Father trying to soak it all in so he won't forget what that perfect love feels like. i imagine him surrounded by his siblings assuring them that their time would come soon enough and that he'd prepare the way, and each of them begging to give mom and dad a hug for them and encouraging him that he'll do great.
i imagine the last teachings he must be receiving to prepare him for the great journey ahead, and the tender embrace of a loving Father that wants so much for his child to learn and grow, yet has such a hard time seeing them leave His side.
and then i thought, let him stay a little while longer.

1 comment:

Mique said...

Sweet post. I'm glad Clint was able to say the right thing at the righ time. And I'm glad you wrote about this so you'll always have documented how you felt right before baby O was born.